Advice for Shallow Parents who Derive Satisfaction from their Moron Kids Success: Just Lie About Your Kids Success, because Your Friends (also Shallow Parents) Don’t Really Care Anyway.

Your kids are already f-ucked due to your parenting, but don’t commit crimes to deny deserving college students from scholarships and admissions.

Breaking: Felicity Huffman, Lori Loughlin Indicted in Alleged Ivy League Bribery Scheme https://t.co/j7LUN6OQzr pic.twitter.com/ppaASRYv80

— Michael Ausiello (@MichaelAusiello) March 12, 2019